








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 64 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2621 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,845 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2989 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2581 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2054 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2221 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $328,734 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 221 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ππΌπ΅Dππ | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Brizzle | 53% | 58 |
| #3 | Xeriphy | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ππΌπ΅Dππ | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Brizzle | 53% | 58 |
| #3 | Xeriphy | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brizzle | 7 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Xeriphy | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brizzle | 159 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | Xeriphy | 104 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | ππΌπ΅Dππ | 27 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | etan | +3.18 | 70 | 66 |
| #2 | Xeriphy | +1.95 | 85 | 60 |
| #3 | ππΌπ΅Dππ | +1.88 | 71 | 43 |
| #4 | Brizzle | -0.04 | 79 | 48 |





