








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1056 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 597 matches | ||
| Wingman | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8446 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,127 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9915 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6962 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 7979 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 7271 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $539,537 of utility $33 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1041 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | kulhydrat | 46% | 137 |
| #8 | Brun0 ⚡ | 45% | 51 |
| #9 | Matt!E | 45% | 67 |
| #10 | Lange | 40% | 45 |
| #11 | Dindenise | 38% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kulhydrat | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | ¤¤VELO¤¤ | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | cajunb | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Matt!E | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Lange | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matt!E | 377 | 0.26 | 12 min |
| #2 | cajunb | 288 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | ¤¤VELO¤¤ | 194 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | kulhydrat | 187 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | Brun0 ⚡ | 124 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kulhydrat | +1.27 | 61 | 63 |
| #2 | donkey | +1.22 | 73 | 64 |
| #3 | cajunb | +1.21 | 59 | 81 |
| #4 | BECH | +0.75 | 68 | 72 |
| #5 | Brun0 ⚡ | +0.11 | 53 | 72 |





