








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 517 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 495 matches | ||
| Faceit | 134 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6208 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,795 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4040 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5176 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5618 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3961 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,680,295 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 225 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XpLiXeR RoXoR YoUr BoXoR!mp3 | 69% | 36 |
| #2 | bigdickAletti | 64% | 36 |
| #3 | tomaly | 61% | 101 |
| #4 | kanivle | 58% | 106 |
| #5 | wemby | 57% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eLoN mOiSt | 12 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | tomaly | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | zb0t | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | SALTTOO | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Jaffe | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 76561197985242024 | 433 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #2 | eLoN mOiSt | 370 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #3 | Jaffe | 353 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #4 | kanivle | 271 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | tomaly | 261 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomaly | +7.74 | 79 | 71 |
| #2 | kanivle | +1.95 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | tjobo | +1.85 | 80 | 73 |
| #4 | mNstr | +1.42 | 71 | 65 |
| #5 | XpLiXeR RoXoR YoUr BoXoR!mp3 | +1.20 | 77 | 64 |





