








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 230 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
944 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1597 | 34% |
| Smokes | 915 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1240 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 921 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $293,904 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 158 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hundehviskeren | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | BennyS | 67% | 18 |
| #3 | Invision ✪ | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | The Narrator | 60% | 15 |
| #5 | OzA | 56% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OzA | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | BennyS | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Slyngel Niller | 1 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Hundehviskeren | 1 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OzA | 97 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | Mala | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Invision ✪ | 31 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | BennyS | 25 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | The Narrator | 17 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OzA | +4.30 | 82 | 70 |
| #2 | Mala | +2.07 | 85 | 64 |
| #3 | Invision ✪ | +1.79 | 59 | 73 |
| #4 | Slyngel Niller | +0.44 | 54 | 48 |
| #5 | Hundehviskeren | -0.64 | 21 | 61 |





