








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 862 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 269 matches | ||
| Faceit | 129 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4043 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,896 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5293 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3534 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5112 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3957 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,577,158 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1399 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sven | 62% | 122 |
| #2 | Sven 8] | 55% | 93 |
| #3 | Fire'4k'cow | 55% | 248 |
| #4 | zetza | 54% | 322 |
| #5 | jELLYBEAN | 54% | 302 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zetza | 14 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Tiger Foods | 10 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Fire'4k'cow | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | jELLYBEAN | 7 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Hunden | 7 | 0.0072 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jELLYBEAN | 839 | 0.13 | 25 min |
| #2 | zetza | 652 | 0.09 | 18 min |
| #3 | Fire'4k'cow | 436 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #4 | Tiger Foods | 334 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #5 | Sven | 220 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sven | +3.26 | 79 | 68 |
| #2 | Sven 8] | +2.23 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | zetza | +1.35 | 71 | 69 |
| #4 | Koller | +0.76 | 73 | 69 |
| #5 | Tiger Foods | +0.60 | 70 | 80 |





