








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 231 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2532 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,544 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3232 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3402 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3856 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4054 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $890,303 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | INTERPOLATE IS BACK | 61% | 41 |
| #2 | Quokii | 55% | 40 |
| #3 | TNO | 53% | 165 |
| #4 | pwr` | 47% | 92 |
| #5 | Alpi | 42% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | powerseN | 40% | 20 |
| #8 | NOT | 40% | 118 |
| #9 | G! | 36% | 33 |
| #10 | Kris 🍍 | 30% | 30 |
| #11 | s4i is legendary@iwnl | 25% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TNO | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | pwr` | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Alpi | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | NOT | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | INTERPOLATE IS BACK | 3 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TNO | 405 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | Alpi | 395 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | NOT | 315 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #4 | pwr` | 180 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | G! | 122 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TNO | +3.47 | 80 | 71 |
| #2 | INTERPOLATE IS BACK | +3.34 | 77 | 72 |
| #3 | NOT | +3.31 | 79 | 72 |
| #4 | G! | +1.34 | 73 | 73 |
| #5 | powerseN | +1.17 | 62 | 88 |





