








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 63 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1073 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,573 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 274 | 17% |
| Smokes | 554 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 482 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 263 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $315,948 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EXCPECTIX | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | Flexosun | 43% | 60 |
| #3 | snuspeek_DosenBier | 43% | 97 |
| #4 | Zeu3 | 40% | 35 |
| #5 | Hazzy | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Flexosun | 43% | 60 |
| #3 | snuspeek_DosenBier | 43% | 97 |
| #4 | Zeu3 | 40% | 35 |
| #5 | Hazzy | 33% | 9 |
| #6 | cocodeznuts | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flexosun | 22 | 0.0193 |
| #2 | snuspeek_DosenBier | 12 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Zeu3 | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | cocodeznuts | 3 | 0.0185 |
| #5 | Hazzy | 1 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snuspeek_DosenBier | 94 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Flexosun | 69 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | cocodeznuts | 19 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #4 | EXCPECTIX | 18 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | Zeu3 | 8 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snuspeek_DosenBier | +4.19 | 89 | 33 |
| #2 | Flexosun | -0.42 | 50 | 42 |
| #3 | HugoX | -0.99 | 60 | 32 |
| #4 | cocodeznuts | -1.24 | 48 | 42 |
| #5 | Zeu3 | -2.16 | 64 | 14 |





