








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,019 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 576 | 19% |
| Smokes | 549 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1099 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 795 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $688,522 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Feliix | 54% | 48 |
| #2 | Börje | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | ♛ BleaM ♞ | 48% | 83 |
| #4 | rbpablo | 44% | 9 |
| #5 | mass | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | mass | 43% | 21 |
| #6 | braaap. | 43% | 21 |
| #7 | OlssonJohan | 40% | 40 |
| #8 | ne0lines | 38% | 21 |
| #9 | Hyphix | | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Börje | 4 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | ♛ BleaM ♞ | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | OlssonJohan | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Feliix | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | ne0lines | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛ BleaM ♞ | 371 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #2 | Feliix | 128 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | mass | 42 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Börje | 37 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | ne0lines | 27 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Börje | +2.69 | 72 | 72 |
| #2 | mass | +2.50 | 50 | 62 |
| #3 | Feliix | +2.14 | 73 | 72 |
| #4 | ♛ BleaM ♞ | +0.96 | 73 | 67 |
| #5 | braaap. | +0.66 | 94 | 54 |





