








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 368 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3232 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,613 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2259 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2888 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3214 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1252 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,440,485 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1466 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 49% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 49% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 8 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 219 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | +3.70 | 79 | 49 |
| #2 | Bosley | -1.24 | 28 | 45 |





