








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 363 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 218 matches | ||
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 102 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3446 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,692 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2003 | 13% |
| Smokes | 4869 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5048 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3772 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,973,691 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 728 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trouty | 71% | 31 |
| #2 | DIESEL | 54% | 202 |
| #3 | microsoft edge | 53% | 356 |
| #4 | IllusionsMD | 52% | 232 |
| #5 | GodSpeed | 46% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | microsoft edge | 25 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | DIESEL | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | IllusionsMD | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | GodSpeed | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Hi I'm Tom! | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DIESEL | 916 | 0.21 | 24 min |
| #2 | microsoft edge | 909 | 0.12 | 23 min |
| #3 | IllusionsMD | 454 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | GodSpeed | 264 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | Hi I'm Tom! | 133 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hi I'm Tom! | +3.76 | 87 | 58 |
| #2 | microsoft edge | +3.71 | 85 | 65 |
| #3 | Trouty | +3.31 | 84 | 67 |
| #4 | GodSpeed | +0.47 | 60 | 66 |
| #5 | IllusionsMD | +0.02 | 70 | 55 |





