








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1748 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,010 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2075 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1554 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2221 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1160 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $532,695 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 167 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | JANPPA1 | 50% | 20 |
| #10 | DJ Lörtti Lyytikäinen | 47% | 15 |
| #11 | Hurley | 45% | 51 |
| #12 | molis | 44% | 9 |
| #13 | Gettolasa | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hurley | 7 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | tipi₿ | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | MZA | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | c0mppu | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | tsouha | 3 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tipi₿ | 435 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #2 | MZA | 318 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #3 | jarskiii | 267 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #4 | c0mppu | 160 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | Hurley | 109 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tipi₿ | +3.38 | 78 | 71 |
| #2 | JANPPA1 | +3.28 | 82 | 82 |
| #3 | molis | +3.28 | 60 | 88 |
| #4 | MZA | +1.48 | 71 | 74 |
| #5 | LISSAJ 8{D | +0.68 | 75 | 73 |





