








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1238 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 561 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 107 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5175 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10907 | 33% |
| Smokes | 9366 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5285 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 7420 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,235,705 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prateezy | 56% | 32 |
| #2 | Pasha Frango | 56% | 73 |
| #3 | Pipoka | 55% | 149 |
| #4 | Cephalon | 54% | 67 |
| #5 | BEBETO -gniK- | 53% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Commander | 45% | 179 |
| #13 | d13go | 43% | 207 |
| #14 | alienfumante | 42% | 43 |
| #15 | J0b$ | 42% | 53 |
| #16 | ryuzera;d | 30% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pedrex | 17 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Pipoka | 17 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | ✪ thalin | 15 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Motoboy de Balas | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | d13go | 9 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pedrex | 1084 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #2 | ✪ Rafa ツ | 569 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #3 | Pipoka | 569 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #4 | Motoboy de Balas | 515 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #5 | ✪ thalin | 506 | 0.06 | 17 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BEBETO -gniK- | +1.77 | 77 | 64 |
| #2 | s0nekha | +1.05 | 66 | 82 |
| #3 | pedrex | +0.44 | 46 | 67 |
| #4 | Pasha Frango | +0.11 | 65 | 56 |
| #5 | luganin | +0.08 | 68 | 71 |





