








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 136 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 105 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2818 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,722 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2482 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2837 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3418 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2985 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $712,372 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 91 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CASPERGAINZ | 69% | 42 |
| #2 | bing bong | 67% | 27 |
| #3 | Marquina^ | 57% | 40 |
| #4 | Blaazeed | 51% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CASPERGAINZ | 69% | 42 |
| #2 | bing bong | 67% | 27 |
| #3 | Marquina^ | 57% | 40 |
| #4 | Blaazeed | 51% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marquina^ | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | CASPERGAINZ | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | bing bong | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blaazeed | 162 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | CASPERGAINZ | 137 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | bing bong | 90 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | Marquina^ | 89 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CASPERGAINZ | +4.90 | 84 | 71 |
| #2 | may0NESY | +1.30 | 82 | 76 |
| #3 | Marquina^ | +1.13 | 90 | 60 |
| #4 | Blaazeed | +1.10 | 83 | 66 |
| #5 | bing bong | +0.41 | 80 | 66 |





