










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 891 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 221 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6073 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 42,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6679 | 16% |
| Smokes | 10238 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 11366 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 14106 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,184,929 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 296 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nemesis | 55% | 56 |
| #2 | Nick3042 | 39% | 102 |
| #3 | MOLLY | 38% | 224 |
| #4 | Dennis ツ | 38% | 55 |
| #5 | H4wkeYe | 38% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nemesis | 55% | 56 |
| #2 | Nick3042 | 39% | 102 |
| #3 | MOLLY | 38% | 224 |
| #4 | Dennis ツ | 38% | 55 |
| #5 | H4wkeYe | 38% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H4wkeYe | 10 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | MOLLY | 9 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Nick3042 | 7 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Dennis ツ | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Nemesis | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOLLY | 500 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #2 | Nick3042 | 230 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | H4wkeYe | 199 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Dennis ツ | 194 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | Nemesis | 134 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOLLY | +3.38 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | H4wkeYe | -0.27 | 48 | 56 |
| #3 | Dennis ツ | -0.44 | 55 | 68 |
| #4 | Nemesis | -1.03 | 45 | 61 |
| #5 | Nick3042 | -1.42 | 16 | 74 |





