








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
495 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,387 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 237 | 17% |
| Smokes | 415 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 448 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 287 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $205,916 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ronald Dump | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | giLLzy | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | bubs✌ | 1 | 0.0085 |
| #4 | PerkFume | 1 | 0.0122 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bubs✌ | 53 | 0.45 | 1 min |
| #2 | rashnok | 50 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | xqzt ` | 27 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #4 | giLLzy | 20 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ronald Dump | 17 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xqzt ` | +5.30 | 76 | 58 |
| #2 | bubs✌ | +3.64 | 63 | 51 |
| #3 | PerkFume | +2.54 | 77 | 58 |
| #4 | Ronald Dump | +2.24 | 75 | 30 |
| #5 | 五条 悟 | +1.90 | 47 | 32 |





