








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 545 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 80 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2878 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,976 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1516 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2323 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2336 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1801 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,084,440 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Rage | 55% | 38 |
| #2 | nervnicht | 53% | 19 |
| #3 | rBN_inc | 52% | 63 |
| #4 | vexolanturmis | 48% | 215 |
| #5 | y1^ | 38% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | rBN_inc | 52% | 63 |
| #4 | vexolanturmis | 48% | 215 |
| #5 | y1^ | 38% | 42 |
| #6 | g0dfather | 35% | 23 |
| #7 | LunchY | 33% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vexolanturmis | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | nervnicht | 3 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | rBN_inc | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | y1^ | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | g0dfather | 2 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vexolanturmis | 612 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | y1^ | 179 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | LunchY | 161 | 0.32 | 5 min |
| #4 | g0dfather | 117 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | Dr. Rage | 89 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0dfather | +1.27 | 46 | 80 |
| #2 | LunchY | +1.23 | 68 | 76 |
| #3 | Dr. Rage | +0.62 | 77 | 60 |
| #4 | rBN_inc | +0.59 | 81 | 42 |
| #5 | vexolanturmis | +0.08 | 73 | 61 |





