








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 391 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4150 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,763 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5024 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4429 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4079 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2231 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,231,978 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neilio | 54% | 102 |
| #2 | Kruglov | 52% | 317 |
| #3 | Sharknad-O #nosound | 52% | 200 |
| #4 | Kay | 43% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neilio | 54% | 102 |
| #2 | Kruglov | 52% | 317 |
| #3 | Sharknad-O #nosound | 52% | 200 |
| #4 | Kay | 43% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sharknad-O #nosound | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Kruglov | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Kay | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | neilio | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sharknad-O #nosound | 705 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #2 | Kruglov | 595 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #3 | Kay | 246 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | neilio | 208 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sharknad-O #nosound | +2.42 | 60 | 53 |
| #2 | j03z | +0.71 | 50 | 65 |
| #3 | Kay | +0.16 | 30 | 62 |
| #4 | Kruglov | -0.98 | 41 | 55 |
| #5 | neilio | -1.05 | 52 | 54 |





