








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1682 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 721 matches | ||
| Faceit | 249 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 114 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9440 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,681 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8442 | 22% |
| Smokes | 7877 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 9988 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 11374 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,710,543 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 507 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lekkis | 34 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | FreshLie | 31 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Simple Jack! | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Blue_Baron | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | S9k1 | 7 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ÆBLE | 1839 | 0.25 | 52 min |
| #2 | FreshLie | 1572 | 0.14 | 37 min |
| #3 | Lekkis | 668 | 0.06 | 17 min |
| #4 | S9k1 | 584 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #5 | S0lid^ | 436 | 0.26 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S0lid^ | +2.46 | 64 | 79 |
| #2 | Simple Jack! | +1.15 | 75 | 69 |
| #3 | Gullfax | +1.02 | 46 | 64 |
| #4 | Lekkis | +0.93 | 80 | 52 |
| #5 | FreshLie | +0.15 | 40 | 60 |





