








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 253 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 246 matches | ||
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3881 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,411 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1981 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3164 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3213 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2053 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $819,235 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 251 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .ADM7 | 63% | 35 |
| #2 | P90 PRO | 50% | 70 |
| #3 | JIMMY™ | BANGER | 50% | 74 |
| #4 | Die Klingelfee | 48% | 60 |
| #5 | K3S | 47% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tolot | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Masl | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | K3S | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | JIMMY™ | BANGER | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Denyo | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .ADM7 | +5.79 | 95 | 59 |
| #2 | pakson.dll | +1.46 | 57 | 70 |
| #3 | overdoxx | +1.33 | 57 | 61 |
| #4 | Masl | +0.51 | 32 | 56 |
| #5 | JIMMY™ | BANGER | +0.43 | 54 | 69 |





