








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 449 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 207 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2969 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,120 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3719 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3423 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2237 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2741 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $624,673 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 186 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tom # | 54% | 26 |
| #2 | fjurriz | 47% | 113 |
| #3 | _BaXter-_ | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | knibe | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | mickeymike | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tom # | 54% | 26 |
| #2 | fjurriz | 47% | 113 |
| #3 | _BaXter-_ | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | knibe | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | mickeymike | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fjurriz | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Tom # | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | _BaXter-_ | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _BaXter-_ | 248 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | fjurriz | 206 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | knibe | 56 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | mickeymike | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Tom # | 47 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cmkHimself☮ | +1.96 | 71 | 77 |
| #2 | Tom # | -1.06 | 38 | 56 |
| #3 | mickeymike | -1.64 | 22 | 68 |
| #4 | knibe | -2.04 | 40 | 62 |
| #5 | fjurriz | -2.23 | 43 | 68 |





