










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 948 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 686 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5971 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,911 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 847 | 5% |
| Smokes | 714 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 6073 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 8277 | 52% |
Our logs show you have wasted $504,813 of utility $32 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1441 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChOuIll3uR | 55% | 141 |
| #2 | <Chriiis.D>'Z rGx #! * | 51% | 85 |
| #3 | Devin Malone | 43% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChOuIll3uR | 55% | 141 |
| #2 | <Chriiis.D>'Z rGx #! * | 51% | 85 |
| #3 | Devin Malone | 43% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChOuIll3uR | 14 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | <Chriiis.D>'Z rGx #! * | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Devin Malone | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChOuIll3uR | 314 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | Devin Malone | 216 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | <Chriiis.D>'Z rGx #! * | 198 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <Chriiis.D>'Z rGx #! * | +1.97 | 56 | 70 |
| #2 | ChOuIll3uR | +0.37 | 31 | 69 |
| #3 | tireur des litres | +0.37 | 72 | 37 |
| #4 | Devin Malone | -3.04 | 26 | 76 |





