








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 793 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 159 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,884 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3179 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2774 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2262 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1669 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $213,983 of utility $55 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 425 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SunFlake | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | RHINO | 55% | 65 |
| #3 | KVR | 55% | 116 |
| #4 | Oupa Ben | 54% | 69 |
| #5 | Skriffels | 51% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | KVR | 55% | 116 |
| #4 | Oupa Ben | 54% | 69 |
| #5 | Skriffels | 51% | 91 |
| #6 | .:RhinoZA:. | 43% | 23 |
| #7 | ☣Sɴᴏʀʀɪᴇ☣ | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skriffels | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Oupa Ben | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | KVR | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | RHINO | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | .:RhinoZA:. | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KVR | 251 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | RHINO | 239 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | Skriffels | 187 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Oupa Ben | 125 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | .:RhinoZA:. | 85 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BadSector | +3.20 | 26 | 76 |
| #2 | SunFlake | +2.41 | 61 | 50 |
| #3 | KVR | +0.37 | 39 | 67 |
| #4 | RHINO | +0.28 | 29 | 65 |
| #5 | Oupa Ben | -0.63 | 35 | 56 |





