








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 488 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3313 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2599 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3090 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2777 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2677 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,111,589 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 365 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | So | 57% | 37 |
| #2 | HDH-_- | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | Nez0hu | 46% | 26 |
| #4 | ℓεɠʀøѕ Cнą† 3njøy | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | So | 57% | 37 |
| #2 | HDH-_- | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | Nez0hu | 46% | 26 |
| #4 | ℓεɠʀøѕ Cнą† 3njøy | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ℓεɠʀøѕ Cнą† 3njøy | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | So | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HDH-_- | 119 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #2 | So | 106 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Nez0hu | 92 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | ℓεɠʀøѕ Cнą† 3njøy | 70 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nez0hu | +1.80 | 82 | 79 |
| #2 | ✪ ℍitra' | +1.59 | 62 | 65 |
| #3 | So | -0.15 | 83 | 63 |
| #4 | HDH-_- | -0.26 | 62 | 75 |
| #5 | ℓεɠʀøѕ Cнą† 3njøy | -2.45 | 46 | 68 |





