








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 47 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
748 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,877 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 552 | 19% |
| Smokes | 887 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 794 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 644 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $201,849 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | milv | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | nza | 68% | 40 |
| #3 | mäkki | 64% | 25 |
| #4 | samir | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | Valterrieri | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | nza | 68% | 40 |
| #3 | mäkki | 64% | 25 |
| #4 | samir | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | Valterrieri | 43% | 7 |
| #6 | Richforever | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | samir | 6 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | mäkki | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | milv | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | samir | 141 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | mäkki | 55 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | nza | 53 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Valterrieri | 39 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #5 | milv | 16 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mäkki | +2.21 | 80 | 74 |
| #2 | milv | +0.96 | 71 | 69 |
| #3 | samir | +0.79 | 74 | 68 |
| #4 | ♞ | -0.30 | 70 | 63 |
| #5 | nza | -0.83 | 49 | 61 |





