








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 542 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4674 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,092 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5079 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7922 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 4204 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3887 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,218,582 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultim8ZedD | 42% | 116 |
| #2 | Dogwater | 41% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultim8ZedD | 42% | 116 |
| #2 | Dogwater | 41% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultim8ZedD | 9 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Dogwater | 4 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultim8ZedD | 239 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Dogwater | 88 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultim8ZedD | +0.19 | 87 | 53 |
| #2 | inolen | -0.42 | 56 | 55 |
| #3 | Dogwater | -1.23 | 69 | 57 |





