










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1418 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,928 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1021 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1091 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1106 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 710 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $923,007 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 122 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deadpower | 56% | 93 |
| #2 | RUSH | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | zap | 55% | 100 |
| #4 | benzy | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | Koggy ❤ | 51% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zap | 227 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Koggy ❤ | 205 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | deadpower | 175 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | benzy | 151 | 0.29 | 4 min |
| #5 | RUSH | 109 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♣Karma♣ | +1.88 | 63 | 64 |
| #2 | KreystiaN | +1.63 | 76 | 66 |
| #3 | benzy | +0.87 | 67 | 65 |
| #4 | zap | +0.62 | 76 | 77 |
| #5 | NΞxT | +0.39 | 59 | 52 |





