








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 241 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
933 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,551 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 585 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1772 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1431 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 763 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $467,118 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Himijimmy | 83 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | | Paradox | | 33 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #3 | 𝓭𝓪𝒹𝒹𝓎 | 18 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | theWolf.$ | 9 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | М А К I М А | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | | Paradox | | +3.84 | 82 | 37 |
| #2 | 𝔗𝔥𝔢𝔇𝔢𝔪𝔬𝔫ℑ𝔫𝔜𝔬𝔲 | +3.76 | 51 | 57 |
| #3 | Himijimmy | +2.43 | 68 | 66 |
| #4 | theWolf.$ | +1.27 | 57 | 37 |
| #5 | М А К I М А | +0.79 | 58 | 32 |





