








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
801 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,906 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 393 | 21% |
| Smokes | 442 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 578 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 493 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $590,373 of utility $221 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 161 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Ⱡ₮฿Ɇ₦J | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Nextris | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | Mr.Process | 49% | 110 |
| #5 | CHUMDooKiE | 41% | 22 |
| #6 | ↺_↻ | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Process | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | CHUMDooKiE | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | ↺_↻ | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Process | 155 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | CHUMDooKiE | 92 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | ↺_↻ | 53 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Nextris | 26 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ⱡ₮฿Ɇ₦J | 8 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHUMDooKiE | +4.43 | 57 | 76 |
| #2 | Ⱡ₮฿Ɇ₦J | +1.50 | 62 | 26 |
| #3 | Mr.Process | +0.92 | 27 | 41 |
| #4 | Nextris | +0.20 | 44 | 39 |
| #5 | ↺_↻ | -1.28 | 17 | 46 |





