








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 164 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 44 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2466 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,991 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4704 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3114 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4853 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2320 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,666,033 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Slicey | 36% | 74 |
| #5 | gold3n | 33% | 87 |
| #6 | sIN | 33% | 70 |
| #7 | its me, juan! | 33% | 55 |
| #8 | Teichhuhn | 32% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | 13 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Slicey | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | sIN | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | gold3n | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | its me, juan! | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slicey | +4.01 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | +3.82 | 82 | 65 |
| #3 | Teichhuhn | +1.95 | 49 | 75 |
| #4 | nobbe | +1.51 | 50 | 83 |
| #5 | its me, juan! | +1.19 | 57 | 68 |





