








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
926 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,984 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1782 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1647 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1291 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1264 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $304,030 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | αlfa | 47% | 15 |
| #9 | Per. | 47% | 15 |
| #10 | lynkineseren dr. Lund | 44% | 34 |
| #11 | Nyredolk | 43% | 23 |
| #12 | 𝓝𝓞𝓙𝓞𝓗 | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SigmaBroCorn | 139 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #2 | PsychoSquirrel | 134 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #3 | Super Saiyan God | 120 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #4 | lynkineseren dr. Lund | 82 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Per. | 37 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Super Saiyan God | +4.69 | 84 | 71 |
| #2 | PsychoSquirrel | +3.98 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | Per. | +3.07 | 63 | 82 |
| #4 | 𝓝𝓞𝓙𝓞𝓗 | +2.89 | 59 | 46 |
| #5 | SigmaBroCorn | +1.40 | 63 | 64 |





