










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2577 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,603 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 711 | 15% |
| Smokes | 981 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1274 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1637 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,131,982 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 151 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trixie | 48% | 260 |
| #2 | Jam; Kell of Toast | 43% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trixie | 48% | 260 |
| #2 | Jam; Kell of Toast | 43% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trixie | 49 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | Jam; Kell of Toast | 8 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trixie | 252 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #2 | Jam; Kell of Toast | 27 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jacey | +2.34 | 61 | 41 |
| #2 | Trixie | +0.67 | 49 | 42 |
| #3 | Jam; Kell of Toast | -4.52 | 11 | 30 |





