








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 128 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1439 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,762 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 152 | 6% |
| Smokes | 645 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1186 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 779 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $273,344 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bobby | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | Toby | | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | sup | 62% | 39 |
| #4 | matervestra | 61% | 36 |
| #5 | odentz | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | matervestra | 61% | 36 |
| #5 | odentz | 59% | 17 |
| #6 | No u | 59% | 51 |
| #7 | jennerboy | 56% | 39 |
| #8 | GboiTriceps | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | matervestra | 8 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | sup | 6 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | jennerboy | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | No u | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | odentz | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jennerboy | 211 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #2 | matervestra | 184 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #3 | sup | 106 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | No u | 68 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | odentz | 41 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toby | | +4.53 | 78 | 57 |
| #2 | soak | +1.71 | 66 | 38 |
| #3 | sup | +1.24 | 75 | 66 |
| #4 | No u | +0.77 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | matervestra | -0.05 | 67 | 81 |





