








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 184 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 287 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2045 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,384 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2987 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2820 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3851 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1726 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,116,521 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 224 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spider-Vache | 7 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | el Gustav | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Ronnie Coleman Prime le TexMex | 3 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | KALASH | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Marmoule | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spider-Vache | 266 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #2 | el Gustav | 181 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | KALASH | 132 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Marmoule | 107 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | MinOu _* | 95 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spider-Vache | +2.37 | 52 | 70 |
| #2 | nackyn | +1.73 | 45 | 48 |
| #3 | b4nks | +1.58 | 33 | 61 |
| #4 | Marmoule | +1.44 | 44 | 70 |
| #5 | el Gustav | +1.31 | 49 | 65 |





