








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1082 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 391 matches | ||
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4854 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,799 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5121 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4937 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3739 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4002 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,999,921 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 290 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noname | 74% | 42 |
| #2 | pb | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | ByFLP | 58% | 36 |
| #4 | Cachorro | 56% | 234 |
| #5 | Gustavinho | 56% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Cachorro | 56% | 234 |
| #5 | Gustavinho | 56% | 107 |
| #6 | HawK | 54% | 65 |
| #7 | _a27eida | 53% | 47 |
| #8 | PARIS13 | 53% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cachorro | 23 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Gustavinho | 13 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | PARIS13 | 12 | 0.0162 |
| #4 | Noname | 7 | 0.0078 |
| #5 | _a27eida | 4 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cachorro | 601 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #2 | Gustavinho | 421 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #3 | Noname | 241 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| #4 | PARIS13 | 209 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #5 | ByFLP | 188 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noname | +5.32 | 79 | 87 |
| #2 | Cachorro | +1.08 | 40 | 78 |
| #3 | Gustavinho | +0.83 | 73 | 60 |
| #4 | n.F* | +0.65 | 59 | 63 |
| #5 | ByFLP | +0.47 | 68 | 70 |





