








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 263 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4666 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4503 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2885 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4121 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1577 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $549,941 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2783 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TRUTHMAKER | 75% | 20 |
| #2 | THETRUTHMAKER | 67% | 18 |
| #3 | Bondlurk3n | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | Tiimwork @ Twitch | 63% | 35 |
| #5 | aVanRyn 3.6 Roentgen | 58% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang | +4.14 | 75 | 75 |
| #2 | Bondlurk3n | +2.33 | 67 | 74 |
| #3 | THETRUTHMAKER | +1.22 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | TRUTHMAKER | +0.84 | 66 | 62 |
| #5 | BillZarN ツ | -0.23 | 49 | 64 |





