








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 178 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2567 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1377 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1034 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1417 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 845 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,936,194 of utility $306 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 270 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KA | 50% | 20 |
| #2 | Sutton | 45% | 20 |
| #3 | Mama Angela | 40% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KA | 50% | 20 |
| #2 | Sutton | 45% | 20 |
| #3 | Mama Angela | 40% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mama Angela | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Sutton | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mama Angela | 91 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #2 | Sutton | 26 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | KA | 13 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KA | +3.35 | 78 | 33 |
| #2 | Sutton | +0.32 | 51 | 56 |
| #3 | btg | -1.07 | 54 | 48 |
| #4 | Mama Angela | -2.46 | 8 | 54 |





