








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 588 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 225 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2071 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,881 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 936 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1147 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2066 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1732 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,412,135 of utility $223 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 697 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sdpy | 44% | 39 |
| #2 | F1rSt | 38% | 50 |
| #3 | bumii | 38% | 32 |
| #4 | Olokio | 28% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sdpy | 44% | 39 |
| #2 | F1rSt | 38% | 50 |
| #3 | bumii | 38% | 32 |
| #4 | Olokio | 28% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sdpy | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | bumii | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | F1rSt | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sdpy | 161 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #2 | bumii | 118 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | Olokio | 62 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | F1rSt | 26 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sdpy | +1.36 | 61 | 61 |
| #2 | bumii | +0.61 | 89 | 41 |
| #3 | ℌ𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔖𝔥𝔬𝔱™⭕⃤ | -1.02 | 29 | 51 |
| #4 | F1rSt | -3.66 | 18 | 24 |
| #5 | Olokio | -5.49 | 4 | 59 |





