








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 625 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 486 matches | ||
| Faceit | 215 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4524 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,108 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5256 | 20% |
| Smokes | 7965 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5354 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 7533 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,331,757 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 886 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Axlekansder | 58% | 127 |
| #2 | RobbaN | 56% | 107 |
| #3 | SparWen | 54% | 85 |
| #4 | Exi | 52% | 239 |
| #5 | NoTiiS | 50% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benim | 16 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | foxy | 12 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Osterstrom | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | yard | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | hampush' | 6 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benim | 2105 | 0.25 | 55 min |
| #2 | foxy | 731 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #3 | Osterstrom | 544 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #4 | r3ijv3nn | 500 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #5 | Exi | 415 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Exi | +3.62 | 89 | 64 |
| #2 | yard | +3.59 | 85 | 54 |
| #3 | RobbaN | +2.82 | 82 | 63 |
| #4 | -Svo | +1.73 | 78 | 69 |
| #5 | r3ijv3nn | +1.54 | 71 | 69 |





