








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 308 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 173 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,814 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2620 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2260 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1628 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2306 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,210,175 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 251 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toasty | 55% | 29 |
| #2 | zaubi | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | Toby | 49% | 192 |
| #4 | Tekteq | 46% | 96 |
| #5 | Rookie | 45% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | [WLS] Schafii | 45% | 85 |
| #7 | ♥LLZ♥ | 43% | 30 |
| #8 | Presk | 43% | 74 |
| #9 | Max | 43% | 56 |
| #10 | Besorgter Kauz | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [WLS] Schafii | 11 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Rookie | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Toby | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | ♥LLZ♥ | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Tekteq | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rookie | 270 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | Toby | 197 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #3 | Tekteq | 150 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | Max | 101 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Toasty | 63 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toasty | +2.83 | 47 | 68 |
| #2 | Rookie | +2.05 | 53 | 65 |
| #3 | [WLS] Schafii | +1.70 | 46 | 57 |
| #4 | zaubi | +0.88 | 25 | 49 |
| #5 | Toby | +0.61 | 48 | 47 |





