








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 211 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2202 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,361 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1728 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2182 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2059 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1392 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $367,597 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Hannes | 50% | 181 |
| #7 | Tak3r* | 50% | 10 |
| #8 | pr0philicious ;-> | 50% | 36 |
| #9 | Mighty Mücke. | 49% | 76 |
| #10 | in.harmony | 47% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | web #halfhyped | +2.06 | 75 | 77 |
| #2 | sav | +1.99 | 58 | 75 |
| #3 | *PulSe ヅ | +1.24 | 73 | 67 |
| #4 | Tak3r* | +1.24 | 67 | 79 |
| #5 | Hannes | -0.39 | 50 | 78 |





