








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 545 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5572 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,549 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4338 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6207 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 1124 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 3880 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,249,233 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brod1220 | 62% | 34 |
| #2 | pogers | 61% | 57 |
| #3 | Ryder | 59% | 41 |
| #4 | Nosom | 58% | 36 |
| #5 | Tiny Dinky Daffy | 52% | 164 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tiny Dinky Daffy | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | pogers | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Nosom | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Brod1220 | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | wendigo | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pogers | 395 | 0.32 | 10 min |
| #2 | Tiny Dinky Daffy | 330 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Nosom | 204 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #4 | Ryder | 115 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Brod1220 | 58 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bazooka Tooth | +2.08 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | pogers | +1.65 | 68 | 68 |
| #3 | Nosom | +1.61 | 83 | 73 |
| #4 | Ryder | +0.94 | 79 | 61 |
| #5 | Brod1220 | +0.79 | 83 | 54 |





