








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1260 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 450 matches | ||
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6016 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,703 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6855 | 26% |
| Smokes | 7354 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6125 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6369 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,301,904 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 595 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w1cked | 59% | 213 |
| #2 | reddy | 54% | 63 |
| #3 | MeAn | 53% | 128 |
| #4 | kallehlol | 50% | 105 |
| #5 | FrankstaH | 49% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w1cked | 13 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | MikeRain | 12 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Virgil | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | dave | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | toko | 6 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikeRain | 1063 | 0.16 | 30 min |
| #2 | kallehlol | 569 | 0.26 | 14 min |
| #3 | dave | 504 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #4 | w1cked | 463 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #5 | Virgil | 400 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MeAn | +2.69 | 85 | 60 |
| #2 | w1cked | +1.92 | 71 | 63 |
| #3 | dave | +1.59 | 75 | 74 |
| #4 | toko | +0.65 | 68 | 70 |
| #5 | FrankstaH | +0.65 | 75 | 59 |





