








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1203 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 85 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3526 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,563 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5197 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5707 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3281 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5378 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,842,808 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3751 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Noodle | 58% | 53 |
| #2 | perxh | 57% | 319 |
| #3 | toastyX3C | 55% | 166 |
| #4 | Sonicbruh | 53% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Noodle | 58% | 53 |
| #2 | perxh | 57% | 319 |
| #3 | toastyX3C | 55% | 166 |
| #4 | Sonicbruh | 53% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | perxh | 52 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | toastyX3C | 32 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | ✪ Noodle | 19 | 0.0177 |
| #4 | Sonicbruh | 18 | 0.0111 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | perxh | 551 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #2 | toastyX3C | 388 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | ✪ Noodle | 173 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | Sonicbruh | 147 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | perxh | +5.26 | 79 | 48 |
| #2 | toastyX3C | +2.97 | 80 | 48 |
| #3 | ✪ Noodle | +2.06 | 87 | 49 |
| #4 | Sonicbruh | +1.43 | 67 | 42 |
| #5 | Gasshu | -1.38 | 50 | 54 |





