








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 481 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 213 matches | ||
| Wingman | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3334 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,670 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3666 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3054 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3181 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3769 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $692,325 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 816 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ----Noah---- | 49% | 170 |
| #2 | Jasper | 48% | 280 |
| #3 | ⭕⃤Sun⭕⃤ | 48% | 92 |
| #4 | jonny | 48% | 113 |
| #5 | Sockstwo | 48% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ⭕⃤Sun⭕⃤ | 48% | 92 |
| #4 | jonny | 48% | 113 |
| #5 | Sockstwo | 48% | 160 |
| #6 | n1ck | 46% | 26 |
| #7 | C4n't hÄndel IT | 38% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jasper | 32 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | ----Noah---- | 30 | 0.0086 |
| #3 | jonny | 12 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Sockstwo | 8 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | C4n't hÄndel IT | 3 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jasper | 1293 | 0.23 | 36 min |
| #2 | ----Noah---- | 628 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #3 | ⭕⃤Sun⭕⃤ | 276 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | jonny | 213 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | Sockstwo | 86 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jonny | +2.72 | 92 | 55 |
| #2 | Jasper | +1.50 | 69 | 65 |
| #3 | Sockstwo | +1.41 | 77 | 48 |
| #4 | n1ck | +1.39 | 92 | 52 |
| #5 | ----Noah---- | -0.31 | 69 | 51 |





