










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 212 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1954 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,772 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 657 | 8% |
| Smokes | 2502 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2325 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2288 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $803,735 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | littlewangsta | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | JorpA | 60% | 52 |
| #3 | Juusto | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | MadMike | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | Fiskars | 50% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JorpA | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Napsija | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Silakkabursti | 2 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | Fiskars | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fiskars | 90 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #2 | Napsija | 86 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | JorpA | 68 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Silakkabursti | 64 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | littlewangsta | 34 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Napsija | +2.97 | 66 | 52 |
| #2 | Ezkobar | +0.81 | 53 | 35 |
| #3 | Fiskars | +0.64 | 48 | 62 |
| #4 | MadMike | +0.12 | 14 | 53 |
| #5 | Silakkabursti | -0.41 | 27 | 72 |





