








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 112 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 221 matches | ||
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3934 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,464 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3169 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4615 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2668 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3012 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $108,929 of utility $15 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | areS | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | deal | 51% | 53 |
| #3 | miiiiiiichael | 51% | 59 |
| #4 | Forced | 48% | 283 |
| #5 | xdAce | 42% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | areS | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | deal | 51% | 53 |
| #3 | miiiiiiichael | 51% | 59 |
| #4 | Forced | 48% | 283 |
| #5 | xdAce | 42% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Forced | 34 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | deal | 26 | 0.0247 |
| #3 | miiiiiiichael | 17 | 0.0150 |
| #4 | areS | 3 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | xdAce | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Forced | 348 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #2 | deal | 126 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | miiiiiiichael | 125 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | areS | 50 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | xdAce | 47 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | areS | +2.90 | 61 | 42 |
| #2 | deal | +1.61 | 64 | 69 |
| #3 | Forced | +0.92 | 51 | 47 |
| #4 | lil tip, type shi. | +0.54 | 49 | 59 |
| #5 | xdAce | -0.15 | 55 | 26 |





