








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3134 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,409 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2415 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2039 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1573 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1382 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $452,539 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Greasy Manager | 88% | 17 |
| #2 | Vxiey | 74% | 43 |
| #3 | Zwarm | 72% | 32 |
| #4 | knatish #teamjocke | 67% | 18 |
| #5 | Ravid | 61% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PETER | 13 | 0.0187 |
| #2 | Ravid | 10 | 0.0188 |
| #3 | Vxiey | 6 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | Ronny Boy | 6 | 0.0190 |
| #5 | Gazly -.- | 4 | 0.0084 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zwarm | 143 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #2 | Vxiey | 118 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | KnataN. | 81 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Greasy Manager | 54 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | PB | 52 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | liam | +4.71 | 91 | 54 |
| #2 | Zwarm | +1.34 | 64 | 56 |
| #3 | Ronny Boy | +0.89 | 87 | 53 |
| #4 | Vxiey | +0.73 | 68 | 41 |
| #5 | knatish #teamjocke | +0.68 | 93 | 52 |





