








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 401 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1737 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,690 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1468 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1661 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1045 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 516 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,042,105 of utility $208 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 126 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 1bu | 47% | 187 |
| #4 | Pauli | 46% | 167 |
| #5 | prada $heidit | 43% | 115 |
| #6 | Kentroven | 37% | 83 |
| #7 | JEPETSI | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1bu | 380 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #2 | Pauli | 220 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | Mehu | 180 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | prada $heidit | 136 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kentroven | 96 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kentroven | +2.58 | 61 | 44 |
| #2 | Pauli | +1.15 | 43 | 51 |
| #3 | prada $heidit | +0.55 | 41 | 32 |
| #4 | 1bu | -0.09 | 32 | 68 |
| #5 | Mehu | -1.00 | 33 | 23 |





