








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 106 matches | ||
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6094 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,783 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6774 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4450 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4582 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3977 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,460,086 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 408 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antonio | 65% | 83 |
| #2 | fee | 63% | 383 |
| #3 | tropex | 63% | 93 |
| #4 | Soikka | 63% | 347 |
| #5 | vesinokkaeläin | 63% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | vesinokkaeläin | 63% | 111 |
| #6 | sankz | 63% | 217 |
| #7 | BigBicepsLittleTriceps | 57% | 40 |
| #8 | Bri- | 51% | 65 |
| #9 | Burst X BoB | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fee | 11 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | sankz | 9 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Soikka | 8 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | vesinokkaeläin | 7 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Antonio | 5 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fee | 1638 | 0.22 | 46 min |
| #2 | Soikka | 1147 | 0.17 | 33 min |
| #3 | sankz | 659 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #4 | vesinokkaeläin | 300 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | tropex | 259 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fee | +2.74 | 83 | 72 |
| #2 | Soikka | +1.92 | 77 | 71 |
| #3 | tropex | +1.75 | 83 | 70 |
| #4 | öge | +1.09 | 77 | 61 |
| #5 | sankz | +0.24 | 85 | 66 |





