








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 996 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Faceit | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 70 matches | ||
| Renown | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8857 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,053 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6152 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2712 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 6498 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4691 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,473,664 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 543 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CornDoogs | 65% | 60 |
| #2 | Voltage | 58% | 333 |
| #3 | TwixFlexx | 56% | 41 |
| #4 | FlanTV | 55% | 128 |
| #5 | Shady ♚ | 55% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Prusakz | 54% | 127 |
| #7 | BooLv | 54% | 296 |
| #8 | ム Wøøkie | 54% | 110 |
| #9 | FORSERIS. | 51% | 157 |
| #10 | ArthurHB | 28% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voltage | 10 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | BooLv | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | FORSERIS. | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | FlanTV | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Prusakz | 5 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voltage | 827 | 0.12 | 20 min |
| #2 | FlanTV | 410 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | FORSERIS. | 394 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | BooLv | 378 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #5 | ム Wøøkie | 374 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FlanTV | +3.19 | 95 | 57 |
| #2 | Shady ♚ | +2.46 | 86 | 48 |
| #3 | ム Wøøkie | +2.30 | 77 | 70 |
| #4 | FORSERIS. | +2.02 | 69 | 67 |
| #5 | ;] | +0.80 | 91 | 57 |





